July 10, 2004

Sadism, Beastiality and Necrophilia

Did you hear about the guy who was into Sadism, Beastiality and Necrophilia?

He gave it up. It was beating a dead horse.

July 09, 2004

Rubick's Cubes

What do Rubick's Cubes and penises have in common?

The more you play with them, the harder they get.

July 08, 2004

Robert Maxwell and Freddie Mercury

What do Robert Maxwell and Freddie Mercury have in common?

They were both knocked off by dodgy seamen!

July 07, 2004

Rabbit with a bent dick

What do you call a rabbit with a bent dick? - Fucks funny!

July 06, 2004

Penis Requests a Raise

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labour
I work at great depths
I plunge head first into everything I do
I do not get weekends off or public holidays
I work in a damp environment
I don't get paid overtime
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
I work in high temperatures
My work exposes me to contagious diseases

Dear Penis,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight
You fall asleep on the job after brief work period
You do not always follow the orders of the management team
You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing
You'll retire well before reaching 65
You're unable to work double shifts
You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work. And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.

Sincerely,
The Management

July 04, 2004

No Arms & No Legs

A man went to a brothel. He had no arms and no legs. When the madam answered the door she asked what he wanted. He said that he wanted a woman. She replyed you have no arms and no legs what can you do? With that he replyed "I rang the door bell didn't I?".